No Stress Fracture!

This is me getting the results back on my bone scan:

While this doesn't mean I'm fixed, it does mean I am free of crutches which is a victory by itself. Carry on.

Destination vs. Journey

One thing I have been thinking about lately is the differences between "destination" and "journey". What I mean by this, is focusing on an end goal versus a trajectory in life - the latter interesting me more. When determined to reach an end goal, I find you can not only lose yourself along the way, but your judgement, morals and the experience itself.

I have seen this in myself over the last year or so in my running. At this time one year ago, I was loving running. Not to say that I don't love running now (because I very much do), but it was different. I never ran with a watch, never kept track of distance, vertical or speed. Sure every once in a while I would do an interval workout or time myself doing something, but largely I was just going out because I liked it. After signing up for what was to be my first marathon, I began to feel a change in how I ran. It didn't seem like enough to just go out and run for fun, there needed to be some end goal - a destination of sorts. Soon thereafter I had my GPS watch where I could get every bit and byte of data I could think of. It was amazing, I could track my performance and see myself get faster every day. I could see other people's workouts on Strava and compete with them and myself every run. It was the excitement of a race everyday of the week. I pushed myself harder and harder day after day. Relentlessly forcing myself to never slow down. This ended in stress fracture number 1. Missing my race, I was determined to swiftly move past my injury and come back stronger and faster. Long story short, this ended in stress fracture 2 EDIT: updated diagnosis is "hip flexor strain with moderate bursitis".

Which one am I running for? It would almost seem to be the above at times.

After these set backs I am really taking a look at what running was, is and will be to me. I feel in a sense that I have lost sight of the experience I set out to have and am now running for a number, a place, a win - a destination. Firstly, I should say that I am by no means opposed to having long term goals, I myself having a long list of such ambitions. Yet, I feel I have lost sight of the task at hand. I've become more focused on the top of the mountain rather than the ground beneath my feet. What is the top of the mountain without what is beneath it? If the top was so impressive, the Pikes Peak Marathon would be equal in achievement to taking the train to the top. Furthermore, does the destination even matter if the journey is satisfying and fulfilling? This is a question I don't think I can answer certainly; though I would argue the evidence points to the destination having almost zero significance in comparison to the journey.

Uninspiring  

I think this concept can be exemplified in 14ers. When I hiked the Democrat/Lincoln/Cameron/Bross cluster, I first though of this. 14ers are thought of to be great achievements, so of course I wanted to climb them. Upon completion I was almost dissatisfied, they were boring dirt hills with little to inspire the mind aside from being a certain elevation above sea level. My first thought was "I could have had a better time on Mt. Sanitas in Boulder". The climb on Mt Sanitas is a 30 to 40 minute path with varied terrain, technical footing and most notably, it is fun! No one is impressed by a Sanitas summit compared with a Democrat summit, but why should that even hold any weight to the individual, if they found more enjoyment on Sanitas? It would seem in this case that the journey largely outweighs the destination.

Inspiring

Going back to swimming as of late due to my injury; on a whim, I did a workout with a random guy at the pool. I forgot about everything I had planned on doing, the yardage I wanted to get to, the times I wanted to hit and how tired I wanted to be. Instead I had a great time pushing myself alongside someone else who shared similar ambitions. When either of us got a cramp, we stopped - that would have ruined the experience to have kept going.

When I look back at my favorite runs ever, many I couldn't even tell you how far or fast I ran. In fact, I'm not sure I have a race which could break into my top 5 runs. What has made my favorites special is the raw emotion I felt. On Pawnee pass I saw the most breathtaking views I could imagine. On the first snow of winter I played on the icy trails of the flatirons. But my favorite of all, is essentially a 3 minute burst of energy I felt on a daily run. It felt so pure, as if everything was stripped away. A journey cannot be recreated as a destination can, which makes them unique and special. I will never experience that moment ever again - this makes that journey all the more precious. There was no goal in that run, no pre determined idea of what I wanted to do. Just running.

Again, I don't want to discount the value of goals, it just shouldn't mean tunnel vision. Once your journey loses its appeal the destination doesn't even matter, since the destination is defined by the journey. Similarly, on journey with an incredibly wonderful experience the destination shouldn't matter. This is how running was to me, how it currently isn't for me, and how I want it to be.

Injury

I was diagnosed with a stress fracture in my hip today - likely in the femoral neck (where the femur joins to the hip). Despite the obvious frustration of this being my 3rd stress fracture in about 2 years (and second in the same spot), my prior experience actually has me feeling better this time around. I know the path ahead of swimming, pool running, ellipticals and all other manner of evil, yet oddly enough I feel determined. Running itself is supposed to be difficult - this is why it is fun; without adversity to challenge us, what are we actually accomplishing? Running is a journey not about the destination but the road you traveled. With that said, my goal throughout this injury is to always be looking ahead at what I can do today, so that when I can finally run again I will be ready for it.

Also I hope the weather is absolute crap so I don't feel like I'm missing too much.

Until next time...

Racing...?

I ran a small 5k to support the top ranked triathlon team at CU on Sunday, it was the first race I've competed in in almost 3 years! The course was a winding loop around campus and the weather was in the 20's so there were a few patches of ice on the course. There was a pretty broad spectrum of just 50ish competitors, 1st place was a 15:27 (yeah, that's 4:59's) while last was 54 minutes. I finished 10th with a respectable 18:41 (6:00 min/mile). I was crushed by what looked to be a 10 year old who ran a low 17 minute, but luckily I was able to hold off the lead woman at the finish. I "won" my age-group - I use quotes because I was actually 3rd, but I guess they don't include the overall top 3 in age group awards. Maybe this is common, I haven't raced in so long I wouldn't know. I won some shaker bottle for protein/supplement mixes, which I don't typically use or believe in but now feel inclined to try. Marketing right?

Participation gloves, had to have at least one picture...

I didn't really prepare at all for this race specifically, I haven't done speed work since September, and my running has been awkward as of late due to a lingering hip injury. I did a 33 mile mountain bike ride the day before, so I feel really happy about my performance all the things considered. If I can ever dig myself out of this injury hole I'm currently in, I'd love to actually start racing again, its a totally different atmosphere (and a bunch of free stuff if you're successful). I still have the goal of a sub-18 minute 5k (current PR of 18:15) and a sub-5 mile (current PR of 5:00, I know right) among others.I have a hip checkup scheduled for Thursday, hopefully something good comes of it, but until then I've actually been getting into biking a lot more. Anyways, now I am rambling.

Also I won a raffle which gave me $25 to a specialty bike store whose website suggests that their lowest priced item is $1090. Maybe they sell sunscreen or something.

Quandary Winter Climb

With the goal of completing a winter 14er climb this winter, my buddy Elliot and I set out to summit Quandary Peak. The amount of gear you need for even a relatively modest climb isn't even comparable to what you need for summer (clothes, food and water essentially). Snow shoes, trekking poles, microscpikes, jackets, coats, sweaters...etc. Still it was pretty fun. Used to summer schedules, we arrived at the crack of dawn to find a fresh snow on the trail. First thing I learned is that "fresh pow" isn't to die for (like it is in skiing) when your trying to climb up it.

Peaking out of treeline

It was really hard work breaking trail, but pretty slow too - the final speed average was 0.8mph. We found our way following the route I had plotted on on my watch, so we were never too far from the official trail. Breaking out of treeline, the arduous grind to the summit - which was still shrouded in clouds - began. Going in short intervals, we continued up for a long while, with me still breaking trail the whole way.

What happened to just shoes and socks?

Elliot topping out over a ridge, winds starting to pick up

As time went on, the weather continued to worsen. The light breeze turned to sharp wind with moderate snow. Up and up we went, another group caught up to us before turning around to be somewhere else (why wouldn't you want to be in storm on mountain?).

Compare with previous picture for weather conditions, pictures taken 45 minutes apart

At a certain point visibility was zero, we could see glimpses of the ridge we were following once every 30 seconds or so, but it really wasn't worth the risk to continue. The pictures don't really give justice to how bad it was; especially with no trees around, it was very disorienting. Looking at the GPS track on a topo map says we made it to 13k, but barometer says 12,700 - regardless, it was fun/hard. Hate to turn back before hitting the summit, but we'll be back. We met another fellow in the parking lot who had also turned around before the summit, since we were breaking trail, not sure if anyone made it up that day.

Elliot heading back down in the white-out

Luckily some fine gent packed out a full trail for us on the way down - much easier this way. Would have been life changing to have skied the glades back down with about a foot and a half of untouched powder.

Descending the path we forged. Photo: Elliot

Breaking on the way down

Snowy

Definitely a good option for a winter climb, had it not been so "Siberian" up top, I have no doubt we would have made it - highly recommend to anyone.

Notice the complete disregard for any switchbacks. Direct lines look mighty fine...

Bear Peak Sunset

I timed my run perfectly this evening and ended up being on the peaks of Bear and South Boulder right as the sun was setting behind the mountains. I felt great on the approach from Shanahan Ridge to Fern Canyon.

Grabbed this before the sun dipped below flatirons' ridge

"The Slab" which I tried climbing at night once (not recommended)

In fact, I felt pretty good the whole time, but I still can't seem to ever get a consistent run to the top. Fern Canyon and the Bear Ridge is ludicrously steep and technical for holding even a jog sometimes. I know it is possible but how much training do you need before you can prance up the 40% grade stone steps covered in tall roots? Honestly I've never seen anyone had a decent run on the way up. Anyways, I'm sure some day I'll see Sage Canaday or Anton Krupicka gliding up with a smile on their face. EDIT: I actually asked Sage on his Instagram if he can run the whole thing and he actually cannot, if he can't I don't know if anyone can (besides maybe Kilian). Regardless, the sunset view were seen whether ran or hiked (but quick hiking!).

Top of South Boulder catching the last rays of the day

Okay now really the last rays

Back on Bear with the sun now out of sight

I actually made it down most of Fern Canyon before darkness hit. I clicked on my light about 100 ft above the mouth of the canyon. Not sure what an actual good time for me is on this route, but at the top I was at 1:30:XX so I decided I would try and make it sub 2 hours. This forced me into a low 6 minute pace final stretch to make it down in a final time of 1:59:09. 6 miles, 3,400 ft of gain, good "run".

Green and Bear

For the first half of this year, I set a goal of getting 30 summits before school is out. So today I went for a triple summit adventure up Green Mountain then across to Bear Peak and then over the saddle to South Boulder Peak. The Boulder trails are generally hard packed snow right now, with minimal dry sections and a few parts with post-holing. Up Gregory Canyon from Chautauqua, I felt good enough aside from the thorn bushes which seem to be in full bloom while every other plant is dead. I really didn't feel like stopping on Green, and the summit was full of some stereotypical CU bros who had taken over the entire summit rock making all the noise they could. I normally don't mind such antics, but on a summit I enjoy silence and solitude.  First time I summitted Green without tagging the official summit marker, I don't think I even stopped. The stretch from Green to Bear was by far the most challenging. You can see Bear immediately, you just never seem to get much closer.

Sunny, but with the wind kept it chilly

I ended up hiking quite a bit of this, between being tired from already doing one mountain and from terrible, windy, snowy, post-holing conditions. As you may notice, I take more picture when I want breaks...

Short shorts don't care

I suffered to the summit of Bear where I consumed my sandwhich. I debated whether or not I still wanted to go for South Boulder. I decided to dig deep and go for it. I descended down off of Bear and within about 30 seconds saw that only one person had been on the trail, and I would be punching holes through deep snow the hole way there and back; I promptly turned around and began the return to Chautauqua. I really like steep technical descent trails like Fern Canyon, I zipped down and took the Mesa trail back pretty leisurely. I continue to wonder whether or not my foot is still semi-injured, felt good today though!

Reflection at a creek crossing

11 miles, 4,500 ft of elevation gain, in a hair under 4 hours, which is just under double Anton's time on this route - so I consider it a success.

Total Summits: 3 (2 Bear, 1 Green)